3 things about Forgiveness

They say forgiveness is the hardest test if we truly love. Just last week, Pastor Ricky of CCF reminded us about this truth and an incident that happened this week allowed us to quickly apply what we learned.

First. Forgiveness is a choice.

Showing forgiveness is a choice just as loving is a choice.

An employee took a huge amount of money without us knowing. She had been with us for nine years. We trusted her as a cashier. That incident made me angry not only to her but to the supervisors in-charge. There were controls but they were bypassed.

It is difficult to forgive her and the supervisors who could have prevented these things to happen but we chose to forgive. She had just gave birth three months ago and might be in need of cash. Her relatives also depended on her solely. As for the supervisors, they were too trusting.

Second. Forgiving is trusting God

We can only forgive by the grace of God. If we trust that God is in full control of our lives and our circumstances, we will surrender difficult matters to Him. We may not know why God allowed certain things to happen, but we should know that He is a great and awesome God.

We may have lost money, but I know for sure that God can restore what we have lost and give so much more! And that this incident is also for our good in the long run.

We started to rethink our controls and our processes. We are still in the process of correcting our system but I believe we will get there little by little.

Third. Show kindness

Vengeance is God’s. We ought to show kindness to people who have hurt us so that they may know God in the process as well.

As the employers, my aunt and my mom could have said or done mean things to her but they acted calmly. They also gave her pay for the cutoff before they asked her to leave.

For me, it was unfair that she got her pay even though she took more but God reminded me that this is a way of showing kindness to her and honoring Him as well.

When we choose to forgive, we will have peace. Choosing to forgive also means we are trusting God’s control in our lives. And lastly, when we forgive, we show kindness.

Love is a choice

I thought I knew how to love until my sisters told me I’m the most selfish person. It hurts so much but it made me realize that I am contained in a self isolating bubble. Their comment initially made me feel bad but eventually made me see how I can grow in this area.

My sister’s doodle art

During college days until I was working on my first job, I was living with my sisters most of the time. And as we spent a lot of time together, there have been quite a few arguments here and there. There were also times when we had the best times with one another!

It isn’t easy to love especially when we live with difficult people. By this I mean people who contradict with you, people who judge you because they know your weaknesses and people who do not necessarily obey you all the time. Sometimes our family can be these difficult people. And in those years, I felt like my sisters were these difficult people. I even sought help through self help books because I was desperate.

Through the years, I have learned and is still learning how to love in small steps but one principle that really helped me is this–loving is a choice. God chose to love us first despite our flaws and imperfections. And so therefore we can also do the same for others.

We should choose to love a person not by what he or she can give in return, but for who he or she is. Make a decision to love others no matter what and remind yourself often.

Throughout those years of praying and asking God for help, I realized that what finally made me grew to love my sisters is this decision.

In one of my sister’s birthdays, I even wrote her a letter where I told her I’m sorry because I have been trying to change her and told her that starting that point onwards, I will love her no matter what.

I am thankful how God turned our bitter relationship into a sweet one! We now enjoy just by being together. I also love how we can talk about the silliest things on earth and laugh out loud especially at night before bed time.

We can’t change people but we can choose to love them as they are and let God change them. And in the process God is also changing you to become the person He wants you to be.

As we continue on in this journey, may we have this desire also to deepen our relationship with God. After all, we can only truly love others by choosing to love God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength. And through His love radiating and overflowing within us, we can love ourselves and others as well.

Celebrated Vday 2004 with dad and sisters